What is the deal with decorating cars for Christmas?

I still remember one of the first times I ever saw a car sporting a Christmas wreath. It was many years ago in Alexandria, Virginia (a suburb of Washington, DC), and I was either sitting at a stoplight, or I was waiting at a light to make a left turn. Suddenly, a huge older-model Cadillac came lumbering toward me in the oncoming lane. Now, it was already a "Look at me!" kind of car, but to add to the ostentatiousness, they'd wired a huge Christmas wreath, complete with red bow, to the front grill of the car.

I remember the mix of emotions as I saw it--first, slack-jawed wonder, because I'd never thought to do such a thing and, as far as I knew, didn't know anyone else who would either, and second, a fit of snarky giggles, at how ridiculous it looked.

Many years and 135 miles to the east later, I was out doing errands and suddenly became aware that there were quite a few wreath-festooned cars going by. I stopped at the grocery store and ended up parking nose-to-nose with a wreath. It made me realize that, all these years later, I still don't get why people feel the need to wire a Christmas wreath to the grill of their car.

As I walked through the parking lot to the store, I spied the next generation of Christmas-decorated cars, and laughed out loud--a car had large felt antlers sticking up from the driver's-side and passenger-side windows. Now I had to admit, that was cute. It didn't elicit the same head-shaking "Why on EARTH?" reaction as the grill-wired wreaths. It was as if someone was having a little fun with the silly habit of car decorating. Now that, I can understand.

Here's a clue--take your foot off the accelerator!

You know how sometimes you are driving behind someone who couldn't buy a clue if they won the lottery? Coming home from my volunteer gig the other day--it's a 30-minute drive on a 1-lane-each-way road--I had a brake-rider in front of me. In front of him/her was a truck that was going slower than the speed limit. So okay, pass it or take your foot off the accelerator and reduce your speed. But no. Brake rider would accelerate right up to the truck's bumper and then brake, brake, brake. Even though I was keeping a civil distance (by taking my foot off the accelerator when necessary, by the way), it was still a pain for this car, which was already going slower than the speed limit, to constantly brake, brake, brake, every minute or two.

You know how you just want to cheer when someone like that finally turns off your road and is no longer a pain in your tuckus? Yea, me too. Sometimes, I DO cheer. It's not lady-like driving behavior, but sometimes it just helps to blow off steam for a moment. :)

Death to Veerers!

I'm convinced that there is a strange phenomenon which causes people to veer their vehicle toward what they focus on. I tried doing some research on this subject on the web (there is actually a book called "The Psychology of Driving"!), but didn't have much luck.

I was walking along a main road in my area this morning--I don't usually do this, as the cars are whizzing by between 40 and 60 MPH, but it was a beautiful morning and I wanted to take a longer walk, so there I was. There is plenty of shoulder on this road and, in fact, most of the road where I was walking is clearly marked with a bike path, which is where I was walking.

I have noticed that, every time I walk on a road where there is no physical (i.e., median strip, etc.) separation between me and the cars, there will always be some drivers who will be driving along just fine between the lines of the road and then, as soon as they see and start to focus on me, they start veering over the line and coming toward me.

This is when I start giving the driver my "would ya please stay in your own effing lane!" death stare. This morning, I shook my head ruefully at two of the drivers who did not correct quickly once they started veering. One lady was on the cell phone and when she saw me shaking my head, she immediately course-corrected.

So okay, I get distracted drivers--cell phones, makeup application, radio knob fumbling, etc. But are the rest of them just psycho sadists who think it's fun to make like they're going to smush little Sheri into roadkill? Or is there really some psychological draw that makes people drive toward me when they really have no intention of doing so? Hmm.

Years ago, a friend admitted to me that, when he drove over the Chesapeake Bay Bridge (quite a formidable bridge for some), he sometimes had a strange desire to drive off the bridge! Yoikes. So if there is a psychological desire to drive off a bridge (likely because the driver is focusing on not coming too close to the jersey walls that line the bridge), then perhaps there is a psychological reason for people veering out of their lane and coming straight at me--perhaps, in their brain, they are saying "Don't hit her, don't hit her." and that causes them to almost hit me?

Whoa. That's some heavy brain flotsam. So do you know the answer? Is there a psychological reason for people veering toward me while I'm walking? If so, share the wealth! Otherwise, I will continue going through life thinking they're all just nuts or out to kill harmless retirees.

Reform, ye spitters!

What is it with men and spitting? Do men have a spitting gene that we ladies don't have? I can't remember the last time I saw a woman hock a loogie in public, but I see guys doing it constantly and I find it totally disgusting. Where I lived previously (the Washington, DC area), I mostly saw guys spitting out of car windows on my way to work. Nothing like flying phlegm to start your day off right.

Here at the beach, I am in a new development that is still being built. Lots of construction guys, landscapers, painters, etc. around all day long. Lots of spitting. I wonder what goes through their minds--"I have 2 more pieces of drywall to hang, but first, I really have to spit."??? What is that about? I just don't get it.

The only time I ever spit is when I have bronchitis and it is necessary for my health that I get the phlegm out of my chest; but I'm not walking down the street spewing my phlegm in front of strangers--I do it in the privacy of my own home and preferably not in front of anyone! And I get bronchitis maybe once a year.

When did men get the idea that it is okay to spit in public? If you're a guy, or a woman who already knows the answer to this, life's most disgusting mystery, please enlighten me!